we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize