WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize