I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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