did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Congratulations! We have a period
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize