I wanna passion pit in your ass
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.