I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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