So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I wear drunk well.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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