Whod you bang
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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