dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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