So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
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