the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
