why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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