The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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