I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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