Don't you send me to vm
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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