Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
you never un-have a 4some
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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