I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize