Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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