there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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