how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize