One girl and one boy is just not enough.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Here’s Why Hotel Photos On Travel Websites Are A Complete Hoax
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.