i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize