But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
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No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
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I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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