You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Say something about gay babies.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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