youre lurking in front of me
I want to have your abortion
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize