i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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