I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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