have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
