I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize