i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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