Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
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