Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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