i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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