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Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Randomize
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