i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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