i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
you had me at cake vodka
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize