I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
