i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.