My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.