it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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