i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
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My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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