I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
