it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
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If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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