Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize