Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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