you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
She needs sedatives and a leash
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize