you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower