My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
