Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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