i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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