just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize